Diary

Day 1 of 2019

Year 8 of my marriage with Mercy has been filled with lots of ups and lots of downs, and 2019 started with waking up next to the most wonderful girl of my life – Mercy, makes these last 7 years really enjoyable and as a gauge, growing stronger in my affection for her and also a deeper sense of stability. We celebrated our 7th year anniversary just the day before on the 31st Dec 2018 without the pomps and we had a simple dinner and spending time watching movies. There wasn’t much to the end of 2018 which marked a downturn on my work and financial situation but it didn’t drown the year and I thank God that these events drew me closer to Him as a result, and there is a sense of stillness and quiet confidence in God’s sovereignty, which has always been something that my spirit is trying to understand its meaning.

With 2019 starting with somehow my relationship with the foster daughter kind of finally getting into the more stable aspect where the notes she wrote to me on the Christmas card did give me some sense of closure to the fact I have a girl and I do love her, next is walking with my grandmother on her final stretch of road while she battles with her age and cancer. It wasn’t easy but I do not find myself in utter despair except again, that quiet stillness that God is in control. The last book of the year I read which helped put an anchor to the storm of my emotions in 2018 by Dr Martyn Lloyd Jones was so critical. For the first time in years being a Christian, finally, everything made sense that Dr Martyn gave clarity to, is something that helped me a bridge over from a stormy 2018 to a calm 2019. God reminded me some weeks back that He will be with me even in the midst of the storms. More storms will come, but I pray that I will put Him first, that my spirit will be matured into a faith that sees God above all circumstances.

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